Hard to say

Sunday, September 2, 2012 |



Taking a break from my freaking outdated updates of my outings, and coming back to what this blog was really created for : my feelings and thoughts.


When I first started blogging at 14, it was just for plain fun, and everyone else was doing it. Random articles and poems from the web, imagining my ownself as a poetic person with loads of rhyming sentences....


I changed from Windows Live to Wretch.cc, and finally settled with Blogger.


By the end of my secondary school years I stuck myself with this blog. I updated it loyally, about my life, recent events, random thoughts and opinions... even when I knew not much people were reading and many rarely cared. My only reason then was that I wanted people around me to know about my life, especially my friends, whom had started to drift apart as distance between us grew.


I wanted them to still know about me. And perhaps updates about me would serve as a topic between us when we did had the chance to meet up. My worst fear was always sitting in an awkward silence with a good friend and having nothing to talk about.


Now this reason is getting more and more important.


10 more days and I'm leaving to UK for my studies. Sounds even soon if I refer to it as next week.


Soon this blog will really be the pathway of communication between my friends and I. And compared to those years ago, there are so much more people involved now. So many more people I wish could know more about how I was and what I was going through. So many more people that make me reluctant to leave...


This short period of time has been the best few weeks of my life. I've enjoyed life to the fullest, I had fun, I met new people and I did so much stuff I would never ever had done before. Most importantly, I didn't take any of it for granted. Every moment was a blessing, and I savored every second.


Yet I still have so much stuff I wanted to do that I haven't done. I still have so much words I wanna say that I haven't said. I still have so many places I wanted to go that I haven't went to.


I wish I had just a few more weeks to be here.


I'm so glad I met those important people in my life. I'm so glad for being surrounded by loving and caring friends. I'm so glad for every change in my life that contributed into what I have now.


 This is going to be my life changing experience. But good byes are just too hard to say.



You know I'm strong, but I can't take that,
Shanay

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